Ask iAN

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ASK iAN – LOOKIN’ FOR A LIGHT

Ok iAN, here is my question for you. It's pretty dumb and, ummhh, pathetic but i guess you accept such questions as well. I like your answers and the way you can find the right words. So maybe, if I'm lucky, you could calm my pain with some proper insights. What on earth should you do to fucking meet someone to share your life with? I mean literally what is the plan of actions, except for patient waiting, to find the soul to be with? Or is being alone is just a cross you should bear and shut the fuck up. Well ok probably i should mention that i'm a girl which makes a difference. Cos being alone when you are male is easier, i believe. Somehow. I'm really blessed with my family and my beautiful friends who understand me and share all the great and though moments with me, who are always ther...e to catch me whenever i'm about to give up and whom i love dearly. I'm blessed with music i listen to and places i'm honored to visit. I'm happy that I can create music myself and share it with others. But. But!!! Something is missing. And it hurts soooo bad. It feels like there's nothing in a whole world that i can do to change this and escape this bitter loneliness and finally start to feel safe and loved. And needed. And important to someone. To give all my loving and tenderness to someone. Well question turned out to be really pathetic indeed. Ok. Whatever. Respect, B.D.T.   Dear B.D.T. Why on EARTH would You wanna find somebody?  . To Share a small apartment with...and listen to them belch, blow ass, blow horn, vomitus, moan, argue, snore, and gobble snacks while watching football... ? No but really i think that it's out of our hands...i do think you have to be present...you have to show up to places where you would pray to have similar interest...Facebook may sound shallow...but really...how better connected to the world at Large could you get? It's pretty much all left up to chance...and bars are not the places to find it anymore... You could take courses at University and at any age...but folks nowadays...unless they meet at work or bump into someone from the past...are Online... I suppose Cafes could be good...as well as BLACK REBEL MOTORCYCLE CLUB CONCERTS...or any gig that you would want your lover to love... We live in such a strange age now where meeting people is easy...but people are too busy, somewhat closed off and hidden, even though they are out there flaunting...lots of tenderness issues...phone issues...job issues...personal self-awesome issues...when a true lover walks through the rain of blood and the trash for you past Midnight just to get you a coca-cola...hard to find... If i really wanted to find somebody to love...i would take care of myself in appearance...work on becoming emotionally strong...because dignity gives off a strong scent...when you feel wonderful...it gives off a certain animal scent and attracts others like minded and animal spirited...that's just my humble opinion... There is always Church The Mall A.A. but who wants to fuck those people? No Offense...but really... Be Yourself...and put yourself out there...in the center of places you enjoy visiting...cause your lover is probably doing the same thing as you and wondering why sweet fuck all is happening... There is no such thing as desperation...only passion unkindled, unspoken to, unsung, and untouched... When you meet friends on facebook or at concerts, you meet friends of those friends...and so on and so on...Get your face out into the world...and when You Dig yourself...first...then You can't help but put out the scent... From being born to dying we have to do a lot of things alone...and we shouldn't have to do it ALL Alone...a little Tenderness is necessary and You're entitled to it just as much as any motherfucker out there... i would avoid match.com and Christian Mingle...at all cost... Love Yourself Show a little of your Heart and let the rest do it's thang... i look forward to your next letter...how do i dump this sorry lying Motherfucker, iAN? bless yer heart and happy hunting in the fields of the Lord iAN     http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuN6gs0AJls