Ask iAN

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Dear Jon

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Dear Jon

  I know you're in Vietnam and we were gonna get married in May, but I have to be straight with you...I am currently sexually investing in your best friend Donny Sugar and we got a tight thing goin' on, i am sorry to have to break the news to you as bullets are whizzing past your scalp, but what better time than now to tell you that, your best friend has a real brigade smoker behind his zipper?

Love ya
So Long
Good Luck, X- Lover

Dolly

 

  No but really Jon

Yer just dyslexique Mate.
You think you hate yourself, but deep in the soul of your jeans you really worship yourself.  You are your own biggest Fan and that is the only way to be sire, inside of this world we call a marketing commercial.  I love you for it...you are a unique and fiesty rascal with the guts to do almost anything...and sir, i would like you to join my own personal private kiss Army.  ( i may be in your neck of the woods someday, running from the police and need a place to crash like a twin engine fuck Lord!)

From the sweet aromatique coffin words of G.G. Allin to the black Shell road of Johnny Cash, you got the crashing force...you have the umbilical chord progression of 7 blessed and black angels.  I dig the way you never forget to laugh even thou your life is getting the shit kicked out of it.  I dig the way that you remember your elders and ignore your doctors when you know they are blowing the fluke kicks of devil trombones.

I like the way you balance a sick everyday mind with the kind of shadow man that wants a tiny nap.
I like that you like me, cause it helps me like you and one day we may even end up at some trucker bar, pounding cold sud and when you beat me at arm wrestlin' i will then force you at gun point to give me 4 dollars for the next pitcher of beer and a few quarters for some jukebox

lil' Hank
lil' Waylon
lil' Black Flag

Jon, you are one of the dirt boys from the cold tracks
you don't hate yourself
because I would not allow that bullshit
in my crimes of court

perhaps it's the position or the state you are in that you loathe
but us women, cut throats, road ghouls and dead saviors all love your full tilt boogie

so fuck you until the next round of Majik arrives
keep your eye on your voodoo cock doll until the Sunrise

and please stop your non guru hate self chant
it is as bogus as the end of the world 2012

pass the pipe
pass the pitcher
pass the salt
pass the cop
pass the football
and shut yer fuckin' hole about self hate...cause i don't wanna come over there and pinch your balls until you sing 17 Christmas songs you will fucking fail at, Sir!

Keep On Keepin' On Jon.

Love yourself.... .*

Like I Love You

Brother.

 

iAN